Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Oh how the tables have turned!

Holy frijoles, batman! Today has turned into a really ridiculous day! I mean, it just flip-flopped on me out of nowhere!

I know, I know, I swore I wouldn't talk about work, but this just has to get out before I go loopy!

Structural changes in my company.

Okay, that's all I had to say, so moving on to how this is "NOT" affecting me...


It could have been me. It seriously could have been me. If I had done "what I was SUPPOSED" to do and followed the ladder all the way to the very tippy top...it would have been me.

Instead, I watch friends walk away from all they've truly known and go home to their families to break the news and pick up the pieces. It's not fair, but I'm glad it wasn't me. If it had to be someone, I'm glad it wasn't me. And there's no shame in my game.

Sometimes I think I'm too smart for my own good. Here I sit typing away while my sweet, adorable boyfriend asks "You writing another blog?" I respond quickly with, "yes, and by the way, I really pride myself on being able to spell, well." (Watch-spell check is going to fail me...on this one.)

And I do pride myself on my intelligence and strength that I am able to retain after all these years of being on this Earth with all of these external factors distracting me, but is it for nothing? No, I can't think that...it's not possible. The mind is a beautiful thing and I like to think mine has gotten me through a lot more than my heart ever would've. My heart has always said "Go, go my sweet into the strange unknown and become what you are meant to be", while my mind says, "No, no my broke college grad, keep that job and pay off your student loans so that you, Sean and the dog may live a normal life alongside your fellow countrymen."

BORING!

But, it's the truth. And I'm okay with that.


Ciao!


P.S.-I almost spelled would like wood. How's that for some shiraz while typing? Ha-thought I'd let you know I'm not perfect.

Monday, January 24, 2011

When the going gets tough...

I'm painting. More than I have in a while and I'm very proud of what I'm producing considering I haven't really marveled at anything as of late. It's beginning to become more apparent that the only way anyone is going to know how creative I am is if I show them, well, how creative I am!

Canvas is tough. It's so blank and dismal when you start out that you're bound to throw anything on there just to make it look even a smidge better than just stark white. That's what I like about painting on canvas, you can almost never mess up with the first swipe of the brush because, it always looks better than it just did. Ahh, that could be a super sweet quote one day! Ha!

I'm growing up. I turn 27 next month and though I don't care about the getting older part, I'm starting to wonder where the time went. Like, where the hell did it go? Growing up is tough.

We have our 10 year high school reunion next fall. WTF? Jesus, I barely go home as it is and now I'm realizing that I've completely lost touch with the people I grew up with. I look at pictures on Facebook and I see all the old cliques hanging out and getting married and being "oh so ga ga" over each other still. I didn't move back home. I left Madison (not too far) and came to the closest city that wasn't Charlottesville to get a better grasp on reality. It worked, for the most part since i don't know what the hell reality is anymore. Do I watch it on TV...or do I live it? Yea, I'll go with the latter.

So, that's what's new in my nutshell-life. I don't want to talk about work. Mainly because, I'm not sure of our social networking policies anymore, but also because, work is work. And life is everything else. I refuse to live for my job. I live for my family, my friends, my amazing boyfriend and our dog. Oh, and gardening, beaches, surfing, swimming and all-around warm weather activities.

Ciao!


P.S.- Yes, brushing up on that Italian minor!-Tough.